Thread regarding Ford layoffs

Help the new president of integrated services succeed

They come from a clothing manufacturer, they sell stretch pants and subscriptions to mirrors, I’m guessing Board member Alexandra Ford English was involved in this hiring decision, so help will be needed!

First, with no automotive experience, they need to understand people don’t buy Ford products for vanity reasons, like they do stretch pants and subscriptions for mirrors.

Second, they need to realize there is no need for a General Manager of Security Services to travel to Brazil and London to study why F-150s are the most stolen vehicles. Those trips were taken just to earn FF airline and hotel points for family vacations. The reason vehicles are stolen is they don’t have door locks that work to keep intruders out.

Third, if you were told people pay for BlueCruise, demand proof. Marketing pays for people to have subscriptions to BlueCruise.

Finally, your former employer’s annual revenue was only $10B, Ford loses half that much annually on Model e. Buckle up, you are in way over your head.

Sincerely,

Peter Stern

by Wheel spinning
| 1682 views | | 12 replies (last March 31)
Post ID: @OP+1jpjs2m05
Comment! It's anonymous!

12 replies (most recent on top)

Worried he might be stretched too thin.

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @28n+1jpjs2m05

I keep hearing crazy numbers, @@ez+1jpjs2m05 can someone please educate me on how this isn’t fraud? If we publicize these numbers, isn’t it misleading investors and also customers alike by artificially pretending we have market adoption by our customer base? How isn’t this illegal from the reputation of a large brand such as ford?

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @1g0+1jpjs2m05

@Original poster - whoever you are, thanks for this post. A good dose of #humor and #sarcasm is always the best way to deliver constructive criticism.

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @j1+1jpjs2m05

Aragon will be sorry if he believed there are. 800,000 subscribers actually paying for any Ford subscription. Hopefully, his compensation is based on increases from that number, because Marketing pays for the subscriptions in every new vehicle sold. Nobody pays to renew.

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @ez+1jpjs2m05

@er+1jpjs2m05

Remove the lip marks!! Priceless.

Mirror mirror on the wall, who is the greatest CEO of all?!?

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @es+1jpjs2m05

@cn+1jpjs2m05 I was pretty surprised that there is such a thing, but now that I know, I can see Farley with a mirror subscription, and BF, DF and CM are all lining up with the new guy to see how they look in their stretch pants 🤣🤣🤣

Need a lot of windex to remove the lip marks…

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @er+1jpjs2m05

Today I learned that people buy subscriptions to mirrors lol

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @cn+1jpjs2m05

Just what Ford needs. A LULU that sells lemons? Wonder what JD Powers thinks.

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @aw+1jpjs2m05

I figured they would take this opportunity to restructure IS.

Guess not.

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @a9+1jpjs2m05

Blind leading the blind. It will never change

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @a6+1jpjs2m05

Also Ford has been in existence for 122 years, current market cap $39B
Lululemon has been in business only 25 years, current market cap $39B

Don’t get too excited about stock options.

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @a3+1jpjs2m05

Excellent onboarding documentation.

Don’t forget that we do dirty work on Webex and voluntarily give up slack receipts

Tasks:
Transfer documentation over to confluence ASAP

by Anonymous
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Post ID: @a2+1jpjs2m05

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