A few less bodies in Lower 48 over the last week. Unfortunately all it does it get the size of the company closer to where it should be, so don't get your hopes up on the prospect of retention bonuses or RSUs or promotions or raises.
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They were engineers who were layed off and are being replaced with squirrels who have had half their brains removed. Based on a combination of research and new decision and risk analysis tools, we've concluded that better decisions get made with statistically better outcomes based on group collaboration with small rodents with half their brains. Technical skills and judgement are no longer required at ConocoPhillips. It's a secret strategy hatched in the bowels of the corporate center. A team of 300 strategy experts and consultants has been secretly working on this program for three years. Phase 2 of the program is to terminate all techs and geologists. They will be replaced by finance analysts and reporters and pundits from cnn. The final phase is to hire a combination of actual politicians and academics from the most prestigious universities and make them all co-managers with our current carefully selected talent pool. This will elevate our performance and accelerate the value proposition.
What were the disciplines of the people who left?
I dont know. I heard that supervisors are scared to death that there will be a mass exodus.
-bev, speak for yourself. I get something done because I work 3 hours a day EVERY day. Maybe if more of the workforce had my work ethic COP would be a great company. You slackers just need to move on.
Good riddance! Anyone not happy at COP is a fool! We are paid way too much to do nothing at all. They will soon realize how good they had it here.