Thread regarding Change Healthcare layoffs

Petition to Replace Change Healthcare CEO Neil de Crescenzo with drummer Neil Peart of Rush

As the corporation begins the first phase of its Initial Public Offering, we require a CEO who can lead us through this important transition. CEO de Crescenzo has done an excellent job managing the Anonymous Notes to Neil forum, adroitly forwarding questions to dissembling lackeys. Under his leadership, management has done a superb job distracting soon to be former employees with bread and circuses like delayed hourly raises below inflation, celebration of PC social justice warrior holidays and causes, and other activities that require spending essentially no company funds.

Nevertheless, we must do everything possible to impress investors in the upcoming IPO. Neil Peart is much better equipped to handle these duties. He can entertain potential investors with renditions of songs like "YYZ." de Crescenzo, on the other hand, cannot drum, cannot play a glockenspiel, and most certainly could not perform the drum solo from "By-Tor and the Snow Dog."

Further, we suggest replacing most of the executive leadership team, with candidates such as James Hetfield, Bruce Dickinson, and Dave Mustaine.

Thank you for your time and consideration of this petition, as we position our company to inspire a better healthcare system.

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| 2514 views | | 6 replies (last )
Post ID: @OP+ZDS8Gnj

6 replies (most recent on top)

Who would have thought Neil D would have out lasted Neil P?

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Post ID: @3Dxja+ZDS8Gnj

At least gru talked to his minions. Neil never takes the time to go to the trenches and see how his minions feel

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Post ID: @7xpb+ZDS8Gnj

Thank you for putting a humorous spin on what has been the worst time of my career. We can all use a laugh right now.

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Post ID: @2jmc+ZDS8Gnj

Neil wins the award for the ‘most awkward CEO ever’. He talks like a robocaller and looks like Gru with a toupee (Despicable Me).

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Post ID: @1qvd+ZDS8Gnj

Rock band drummers have more longevity than CHC employees.

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Post ID: @awv+ZDS8Gnj

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