Share the stupidest titles of people not doing actual work, but in a self-servant role for maximum kiss a5s and visibility:
Almost anything in EMIT (e.g. "Scrum Master", "Solutions Architect", "Product Owner", "Digital Transformation Lead"). Anything in "Low Carbon Solutions" or EMRE's "Innovation Chief". Almost anything in HR or SHE.
Then there are all of the high level business manager positions (e.g. "North American Accounts Manager") - what on earth do these people do all day, when it's the people further down the chain that actually manage the accounts with our customers and win (or at least maintain) the business ?
Probably the most ridiculous job title that I've ever seen for someone in EM though was "Space Supervisor". I mean, what the heck does that job involve ?
Vice President
Sr. Vice President
Global Technology Sponsor (GTS)
A title that only exists within EM
“Center of Excellence” ..
Especially when it’s lead by an incompetent, with no subject matter expertise.
Scrum Master
Customer Experience Manager
All those mo--ns in Internal Communications, or worse, the professional liars in PG&A.
They all have made up titles - almost as made up as the spin, Koolaid, and snake oil those cheerleaders peddle.
Development Planner
Torsional Umbilical Research Director
Senior Hr Implementation Technician
Professional Opportunity Supervisor
I could go on ………. But I guess you’ve seen enough.
Conference manager …
This forum is great for sharing insider information. But this thread is downright horse sh-t. No one, and I mean no one, deserves to be treated less than by jackasses who think they are better than. Y’all need some religion perhaps, compassion and less self righteousness.
Anything with Digital, add Transformation or Enablement if your facilities are that backward.
Department Head - anyone know what they do? What do they contribute?
Anything in low carbon “solutions”.
Just good ol’ make believe and greenwashing.
Select stage manager
Hindsight economic advisor
Senior Executive Chairman of The Board and The Good Ol' Boys Club
Any so-called EMIT “Architect” title. Maybe ten percent of these rubes deserve the title, but the majority of them don’t know sh-t about the areas they’re supposedly SMEs in, and are padding their ranking bullet points with the accomplishments of others, including vendors which they HEAVILY rely upon and whose work they claim as their own.
Technical team lead with no technical skills SE in Delaware basin.
Staff Development Manager
planning manager, excellence advisor, any form of advisor really
Director of Continuous Improvement
EMIT Apps CoS
Senior Brown Noser
Senior Vice President, especially since we have no Junior Vice Presidents.
“….Manager”
Retiree.
Chief of Staff
Scrum Master and Product Owner
Agile's SDM
“Decision Science Advisor”
What a fancy way to say: we guess what the boss wants the answer to be.
Senior Technology Advisor
Planning Advisor
Advocacy Advisor
Especially if the person have no experience in the area they are providing advice on.
Here’s one (or several) - majority of North America marketing for finished lubricants leadership. Running the Mobil 1 and delvac brands into the ground one agile task force at a time all while losing massive share and equity - literally doing nothing. Meanwhile -Pennzoil eclipsed Mobil 1 for first time in decades? Yep!! Sell it now while you can still make money off the brand. Soon it will be the next santoprene but worth way less. Embarrassing. People bailing left and right and don’t blame them one bit!
Venture Executive
“IT Business Management” anything
“Modern Architecture” anything
Disruptive Technology Advisor and Scout
Senior Technical Consultant-who do no technical work!
How about Director?
The board members not only get to set their own salary but given all we have seen, they don’t even fulfill their responsibilities of oversight.
Each one makes at least $300k a year for showing up to a meeting - what- once a year maybe??
https://boardofdirectorssalary.com/exxonmobil/
Job Ki---r 3000
Corporate DJ and cultural ambassador