Red light #16. EMDC always has a tuition freeze right after a " modest tuition increase". So technically we are not being deceptive when we announce the tuition freeze. You got it? That's ok, we do.
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Red light # 27. Some of the EDMC brands have colleges of "business." To be fair to them, it may be prudent, dear students, to take a cap in the you-know-where first. This way you'll be better prepared to fully appreciate their words of wisdom as clearly demonstrated by their historically superior business acumen. Or, you could just take a cap in the head and save a buck or two.
Red light # 26. Much has been said about EDMC's low rates of graduation. For
instance, it has been reported on "college
scorecard" that a South University branch in Tampa, FL had a graduation rate in health related sciences of 3%. Some would say this number is indefensibly low. EDMC prefers to think of these graduates as the creme of the crop or at least what's left of the crop.
Red light #25. Although EDMC's OTC stock price is not at an all time low at six cents a share, pundits say there's still plenty of money left in our coffers to run operations after depleting the funds of many smaller investors. You may refer to this tactic as value added if you're so inclined. At least that is what Chris Hardman told me to say.
Red light # 24. EDMC has always made a solemn pledge to offer secondary education to those who have been historically denied it by traditional schools. To this end they have identified a special-needs sub-set of the overall student population such as minorities, older students and just about anyone of any age who wanted to make a positive change in their lives and took care of them in every sense of the word. Finally someone is caring for these folks in a way EDMC believes they truly deserve. God bless.
Red light # 24. EDMC has always made a solemn pledge to offer secondary education to those who have been historically denied it by traditional schools. To this end they have identified a special-needs sub-set of the overall student population such as minorities, older students and just about anyone of any age who wanted to make a positive change in their lives and took care of them in every sense of the word. Finally someone is caring for these folks in a way EDMC believes they truly deserve. God bless.
Keep em coming... this is some knee -slapping- he- haw- good stuff
Red light #23. EDMC exsists as a corporate entity through the largess of the the Wall Street investement firms of Goldman Sacks and KKR. And as such we know that peace, love and understanding are their respective middle names.
Red light #22. One of EDMC's most favorite degree offerings is in criminal justice. And as reflective of the organization as a whole, it's top heavy in criminal and light on justice.
Red light # 21. EDMC has many far-flung schools nation-wide that offer a variety of degrees from soup to nuts. But from the way they run this "business" you would think it was just ... well you know.
Red light #20. EDMC "used to" monetarily incentivize admission reps to facilitate the enrollment of as many students as possible each semester. Many of these students were financially illiterate and vulnerable to promises of "free" money to "help" them achieve their educational dreams. When called on this dubious unethical practice, EDMC lawyers responded by saying "Hey,it was legal at the time!" You know folks some child molesters have more scruples. Unfortunately,I can't find any humor in this one either,sorry.
Red light #19. Schools publish no information on the pass/fail rate of professional licensure exams. This fact is consistent with the usual lack of published qualitative measures that students could use to assess their future success. So it's all your fault once again sacraficial lamby pie. We call this our solemn commitment to us,, naturally.
Red light # 18. Wow! 2004 revenue was 850 million. Holy smoke! 2007 revenue was 1.4 billion. HELLO DUMMY, IT'S 2015 AND WE WEARING CARDBOARD BELTS!!!!
Red light #17. The internet is replete with examples of misleading statements, half-truths and downright lies all brought to you courtesy of EDMC spokesman Chris Hardman. You can't make this stuff up folks! How you say "could do limbo under rattle snake."