Thread regarding Verizon Communications Inc. layoffs

Dr. Evil CEO Part One

Somewhere In the secret lair/boardroom of the Dr. Evil organization sometime in 2014

Dr. Evil: Gentlemen I have a plan, we will create a new app; it will be like a channel where people can watch videos..... on the internet! When the young kids want to watch something they will have to do it through us! We can sell commercials that the kiddies will have to watch to see their precious videos..plus we can datamine them for marekting info! We get them coming and going! Eventually the success of this operation will allow us to rule the world!

No. 2: Ahem...sir that idea was already developed in 2005, it's called Youtube.

Dr Evil: Hmmph! Well nobody told me about it....OK well no problem, here is my second idea...we will create...A Social Network! All the riff raff can post cute pictures and stuff and interact with their little friends, our service will become ridiculously popular, meanwhile we can datamine all the peasants for marketing info and sell it to the highest bidder!

No 2: .......Sir..... that idea was also already developed it is called Facebook and it has been available to the public since 2006. It is quite popular with the peasants already

Dr. Evil: mmmmk... well throw me a frickin bone here people! I have been frozen since 2006 you know! ....No matter I have a third idea....instead of trying to sell people cable boxes we let them pay us to stream content online. In the beginning we will tell them it is free of course...meanwhile we force them to watch commercials plus we can datamine them and sell the info to the highest bidder! I like to call it "operation over the top" because it really is "over the top"...Muha! Muhahaha!

No 2: (sighs) Sir OTT content has been popular for some time now. Netflix was a pioneer. I know we just unfroze you, but you must have been briefed on the "Redbox Instant" debacle

Dr Evil: (Holds his finger over an ominous red button on his desk console) Mention Redbox instant one more time Number 2! I dare you! ....I just had a great idea! What if we combine all these ideas into one service....a service with a really cool name so the kids will all think its real groovy. A name like.... go90! And we will use cool names like "crews" instead of "friends" I mean who says "friends" anymore? That's so Dad-Jeans. Ok lets go people! Here is 200 million to get started..Don't look at me like that No 2!

to be continued...?

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Post ID: @OP+O3ZjC17

7 replies (most recent on top)

This story is just missing Sugarstring and Viewdini...

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Post ID: @3iii+O3ZjC17

OP, if you work here you are wasting your talents.

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Post ID: @2kzm+O3ZjC17

@1lat Oh great the 10 year old kids have found out about this site...

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Post ID: @1wmh+O3ZjC17

Lowell say I not dr. Evil. I WILL SMAAAAASH YOU!!! I AM BLOWELL AND I RULE, YOU ARE SIMPLE MINDED HUMAN WORKER WHO WORK FOR MEASLEY WAGE. I TAKE PLANE TO AMSTERDAM AND FUKK WOMYN!!! I AM BLOWELL, HERE ME ROAL!!!

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Post ID: @1lat+O3ZjC17

Lmoa

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Post ID: @1xnn+O3ZjC17

Funny because it's so true!

Even with IOT, same business principle ("ideas") and so late to the game. We've over extended ourselves and our employee base will pay. Weve already upset our IOT partners who 100% connect to AT&T. #ELD mandate

Mistake? I think Not!!

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Post ID: @iuc+O3ZjC17

Good post

Awesome

Keep it up

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Post ID: @qul+O3ZjC17

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