I am almost certain I will be axed this time around. Aside from a dull gut feeling I have nothing else to use as an explanation for expecting this, yet, I feel I am already on the list despite the fact that I have a 3/3 rating. An exceptional performer, a top contributor? Yep, it makes no difference now.
I am not even sure if I care anymore despite the fact that I provide for the whole family and I actually used to love my job.
So far I have had to reapply for my job several times – this is not my first rodeo. Yet, 2018 is different and now it looks like they are doing things randomly and picking every third name on the long list of losers.
And even if I somehow get lucky and my name is chosen, if I am spared one more time – would it matter given all insane metrics that are being enforced now?
Nothing makes sense any more…